A Lesson in Listening

I’m doing this in light of the fact I shoud be studying for a  Media Ethics final, but I’d rather not….it’s too unethical to study for ethics.  Anyways…

When somneone tells you to “listen up”, one would generally associate it with hearing what they’re gonna say.  Then how could a deaf person ever “listen up” if they can’t hear.  Well you don’t hear to listen…listening is something that can be done with all five (or six) senses.  Listening is simply understanding what is going on.

Let’s take someone who speaks only Swahili and tell him to hear what we say.  He’ll never be able to listen to what we say…he only hears sounds dissociated with his language of comprehension.

Now, a deaf man is in a forest.  He hears nothing, but sees trees swaying.  He therefore has listened with his eyes, though he never heard the sounds of the breeze in the trees.  If a blind man touches the trees, he can feel the swaying of the tree, therefore, the blind man has listened to the feel of the tree and understood that it was swaying in the wind.

If you blindfold yourself and eat sugar, you listen to the taste and understand it’s sugar.  If you smell a pizza, you know it’s a pizza.  Without any object or idea that you have nothing to associate with, you will never be able to comprehend, and therefore, never be able to completely “listen” to it.

I’ve lived my life hearing people say “God never speaks to me…he never tells something”.  If someone knew how to truly listen, they would understand that God is always speaking to them, but not necessarily using words, and if you’ve seen Dogma, you would understand that if God spoke directly to you, you’re head would explode into millions of pieces.  God has been speaking to you since the day you were born, but without being able to understand the road he has laid out for you, you would never figure out that he has been speaking to you.

As a catholic, I was always told that creationism is the only way the earth was created. Seven days, seven nights…the whole nine yards.  Ehh….maybe.  As a skeptic, I have reason to beleive in evolution, natural selection, and so on and so forth.  These two paths have never been accepted as maybe being coordinated in some way, and I’m not saying they are, but that can’t generally be ruled out.  God has used this as a way to tesst your faith in him.  If you beleive in evolution, you’re not neccessarily anti-christ, but it’s more about thinking outside the religious box.

So, in closing, i don’t beleive entirely in coincidence.  I believe in coincidence with a purpose.  God laid out something, and it’s my job to understand what he’s trying to tell me

It’s finally over

The political campaigns are finally over.  Now we can relax for a few months before they start advertising for the next presidential nominee..

5 things I like about being Minnesotan

1. We are the BEST drivers in the world. When it comes to winter blizzards and driving, we are the experts. Minnesotans…the only people willing to risk their lives for a gallon of milk during a blizzard.

2. The change of seasons. This means something different to everyone…from winter to spring, spring to summer, summer to fall, fall back to winter….you know the drill. Not only is this really nice, but it also seems to piss us off at the same time. Minnesotans…bipolar???

3. The cold winters. The temperatures in the winter are enough to keep bugs and allergies at bay…along with the annoying southerners from Florida and Texas. Minnesotans….Xenophobes?

4. Being in the Midwest. Yes, Minnesota is the greatest state in the Midwest, simply because Iowa is corny (bad pun), the Dakotas really need to be only one state, Chicago, Illinois has two teams named after the same animal (Bears, Cubs…lame!!!), and Wisconsin…well, we all know about the Packers…and the Brewers….and the basketball team, whose name is escaping me right now. Minnesotans…Conceded???

5. The Minnesota Twins and Vikings. Yes, the best part of Minnesota. A team that celebrates our rich Scandinavian heritage (though I’ve heard the Vikings are originally from Denmark), and the team that celebrates the simple fact that the two biggest cities in the state are right next to each other. The Twins won two World Series, 1987 and 1991 and have come so close since then…go them!!! The Vikings…..ummm, I’ll get back to you on that. Minnesotans….mildly depressed or in denial???

The joys of being a Vikings fan

To those of us that are Minnesota Vikings fans, we are able to enjoy many perks of being so.

1. We are able to wear the color purple, despite how “femmy” it may look, and not be called gay.

2. When the Vikings win a game, we are able to rejoice and look forward to next week’s game against some team that’s done far worse than us all season…..only to be beaten by them….in the most ridiculous way.

3. We get the joy of saying “We had Randy Moss first.” We also have the joy of saying “We had Tarvaris Jackson first.”

4. The Vikings have are tied for third with the most super bowl visits….and also have the most Super Bowl losses.

5. Bud Grant….and Mike Tice

6. Dennis Green was fired from our franchise (only had one losing season) and went to turn around the Arizona Cardinals to a somewhat competitive team, where we haven’t had a playoff season since he left.

7. The Gophers get their own football stadium, and if the Vikings ever get their own stadium, we have to play in the Gophers stadium until it’s done…much like the Gophers are doing now.

8. 1998 and 1999 rocked…..why did 2000 have to come?

9. at least our division sucks….just like us

10. We can tease Packer fans after the Pack loses a game…which they rarely lose against the Vikings….ouch!

Is college worth it??

Tuition:

$3,000-$30,000 a semester, depending on school

Books:

$7-$700

Backpack:

$15

Having a screwed up back for the rest of your life because that’s how you get educated:

Priceless!!!

What if…

What if Brett Favre joined the Minnesota Vikings? It could be fairly sweet considering he helped the Green Bay Packers win two super bowls, broke 4 records last (I saw the 421st touchdown pass in person), won three consecutive AP MVP, and has managed to go into retirement 3 times, and cam back out within the short amount of time the offseason has to offer.

Minnesota Viking fans have been booing the name “Brett Favre” for the last 16 years.  But now with the possibility that he may join the Vikings, who’s name will the fans have to boo now.   The best part about all of this is that the Viking and Packers face each other for season-opener at Lambeau Field on Monday Night Football.  Could this get any better.

If Brett does join the Vikings, the Vikes will go 17-2, all the way to the bowl, winning said bowl might be a different story.  With T-Jack in front, Vikings will go 13-3, losing in the first or second round of the play-offs to the wild-card team.  No need to change what’s happened the last seven seasons.

SKOL VIKINGS!!!

My first real youtube-worthy performance

This is a video I made as a project for my German class last semester

A little insight into my job…

Printing press and Folder

In 1892, Luther Crowell was issued a patent for a printing press that could also be run in line with a folder. The operation could be made with any size cylinder press, but for the sake of simplicity in his patent, he used a single-cylinder, offset perfecting press. The invention was really an attachment to a press, more than an entirely different machine altogether. The folding apparatus was actually set below the press machine.

The original concept behind this was that the press would run the sheet through, printing on both sides, and then feed it out as usual. From there, if the folding machine was in place, the piece would be picked up and be folded down to a four or eight-page document, or the document could consist of two folds. This process cut down the cost of having to run the piece through two separate machines. The original purpose was to print and fold paper bags, but this technology, or one of a similar sort, would be used in the newspaper industry further down the road.

In today’s modern print world, a machine of this type would be nearly unheard of. Most of the offset inks, used in most presses, need hours or days to dry completely enough to where the piece is workable by the bindery, where folding happens. The only way this machine could be utilized is on a UV coating press, where a UV, or ultra-violet, coating gets put on the piece. The UV ink coating dries almost immediately after being exposed to an Ultra-Violet light system, equipped inside the press’ delivery. An aqueous coating on the piece will also enable a faster drying, but time is still the biggest factor in bindery.

Another possible issue with this is that folding and press were two separate trade crafts. While the pressman was running the machine, a folder operator would have to be there to observe the folding unit. Make ready was also very different. The pressman had to make sure everything was on with the press before the folder operator could complete his setup.

“Folding was probably the first “post press” operation, going back to the time of the Egyptians and papyrus. Knife and buckle folders probably developed along with lithography beginning in the 18th century. Operating a folding machine was always a bindery “craft.” with a lot ot skill and experience needed to correctly set fold rollers, buckle plates, deflector plates and cross-fold knife units.” (Piontek, 2005)

There are currently inline systems that have the ability to do what the bindery usually does that can be attached on the back end of a process, but such systems are made mainly for print shops that specialize in direct mailers, since they are expensive to operate for companies that may not run many mailers. The systems do require some bindery operators to operate such equipment as the plow folders, cutters, die-cutters, and inkjets.

The only presses that currently operate solely on this kind of equipment are newspapers. There high-speed web presses are set up to run the same thing every day. This is very time saving, since there is no need to really change any of the settings. The only thing that changes is the plates that carry the offset ink onto the paper. The machine otherwise have the same set-up 24 hours a day. The reason that the ink on newspaper doesn’t bleed onto opposite pages is because the stock that is used. The very thin dull text paper stock quickly absorbs ink into its porous body. The inks that are used are also very quick drying, but can still be rubbed off.

Today’s modernized digital printing also has the ability to be handled right after press work. Digital print is classified as a sheet that does not use plates like a regular press, but is more like a gigantic computer printer that can run at much faster speeds. One of these machines is Xerox Corporation’s new iGen3, which uses an ink that is almost classifiable as a plastic. The process can printing on something already printed, like a mailer, for example, like most digital print machines can. On top of that, the iGen3 can also print in full color, adding a mailing list into the pieces printing, even making names appear in several place. The pieces that come off the iGen3 are able to be handled by the bindery as soon as it’s off.

Luther Crowell’s invention has served a purpose, but not necessarily for most printing today. The ink used in most companies doesn’t dry quickly enough for such a quick post-press operation. There are, however, solutions to that issue. Digital print and certain ink coatings are all able to counteract the inks wet state and enable the automatic post-press folding machine to take on its role.

Works Cited

Eskildsen, Jan. “Xerox: Digital and Coated.” The Seybold Report: Analyzing Publishing

Technologies October 19, 2006: 3

Hamilton, Alex. “Finishline: Coating Key to Durability.” Graphic Arts Monthly July 2007: 40

Kalkowski, John. “Ink Staying Strong.” Graphic Arts Monthly December 2007: 17-22

Lenatti, Chuck. “Digital Print is Growing: but, is it Good for Printers?” Seybold Report: Analyzing Publishing Technologies February 21, 2008: 14-16

Piontek, Dan. “New Face for Folding.” Graphic Arts Monthly April, 2005: 34-38

Toth, Debora. “Inline Systems Finish Web Jobs.” Graphic Arts Monthly May, 2000: 59-62

Upon Realization

“UPON REALIZATION”

By

Jay Jorgenson

FADE IN:

EXT. ALLEY BEHIND BAR – NIGHT

ADAM stands in alley by wall, smoking a cigarette. MUSIC from inside the bar can be faintly heard, but still somewhat inaudible.

(SOUND OF STEEL DOOR CLOSING)

JARED, a young man in about his mid-twenties, enters and stands next to Adam. Jared starts searching pockets for a cigarette, but finds none.

JARED

(Checking all pockets)

Hey, you got a cigarette I can bum

off you? I think I left mine at

home?

ADAM

(pulling out cigarettes)

Yeah, sure, man. I hope you like

these. Not many people do

JARED

(Taking cigarette)

These are actually the kind I

usually smoke.

(Offers hand to shake)

…Jared.

ADAM

(Takes Jared’s hand and shakes)

Adam. You from around here?

JARED

Yea, I’ve lived here for a while now.

I come to this bar quite often, lots

of people to see. I’ve never seen you

before. You new?

ADAM

I just moved in a few blocks away a

couple of weeks ago. This is my

first time here, it looked inviting.

JARED

It’s kind of a dead-end town. I know

much everyone in town. You should be

seeing tumble weed rolling by soon.

(LAUGHS)

ADAM

(LAUGHING uncomfortably to humor Jared)

Have you lived here your whole life?

JARED

Naw! I once lived out by D.C. for a while.

That was a long time ago. I think I was

About five-ish when we came here.

ADAM

(surprised)

D.C.? That’s a helluva move from there to

Tenney, Minnesota. Why did you move here?

JARED

(pauses for a moment and looks up)

Well, my dad was a politician all those

years ago. A real big-wig on Capitol Hill,

(turns to Adam)

ya know?

(pauses for another moment, sighs)

But one day, he was speaking in front of

A big group of people in Philadelphia,

when an assassin gunned him down. The

secret service moved my mom and I out

here.

ADAM

(shocked)

Whoa! I’m sorry to hear that. I kinda

regret asking.

JARED

(laughs a little)

It’s cool. I guess we just got a little

too comfortable here in Tenney and

never left.

(Bottle BREAKS inside bar, YELLING)

JARED

(snubs out cigarette)

Dammit! I better get in there before

things get out of hand.

ADAM

Alright, I’ll be seeing you around, I

suppose.

(Adam goes back to smoking, when CLAYTON, an older man, joins him)

CLAYTON

You’re new here, aren’t you?

ADAM

(Somewhat surprised, caught off guard)

Yea! What tipped you off?

CLAYTON

(somewhat proud)

I’ve got my sources.

(pulls out cigarette and lights it)

What’s your story?

ADAM

Well, I just moved here a few weeks

ago. I’m working in the next town at

an insurance firm, but I’m thinking

of starting my own right here. You

got a job?

CLAYTON

No. I’m happily retired. I used to

work for the government.

ADAM

Were you a postal worker?

CLAYTON

No, I worked with the CIA, but now

that I told ya, I’m gonna have to

kill you.

(both laugh)

Actually, my job was slightly more

than a cushy desk job. I was into

“protecting the government from

itself”.

ADAM

(puzzled)

Protecting the government from itself?

CLAYTON

Let’s just say they hired me for my

sharpshooting skills?

ADAM

(shocked)

Wait, so were a sniper? Are they gonna

come and kill me now? Are you sure you

should be telling me this? I don’t even

know you.

CLAYTON

It’s alright. I ain’t got much time

left anyways. I figure that a perfect

stranger would be a good person to

let it all out.

ADAM

(Sorrowfully)

Alright, I guess I got the time? Tell

me what’s on your mind.

CLAYTON

I’ve had to pick off dozens of people.

Anywhere from regular Joes to

politicians, native and foreign. I

never regret any of them, except for

one.

ADAM

(Snickering)

Anyone I might know?

CLAYTON

You would have been pretty young, I

imagine. The only problem with the

kill is that it was a mistake. He

wasn’t my target. I got some really

bad info.

ADAM

Wow! That sucks.

CLAYTON

I found out later he had a wife and

kid. I’ve spent years trying to find

them, but I imagine that the secret

service moved them and changed their

name. I’m at the end of my rope.

(Door SLAMS, Jared enters)

JARED

Clayton! How you doing old man?

CLAYTON

I’ve seen better days, ya putz.

(both laugh)

JARED

I see you’ve met my neighbor,

Clayton.

ADAM

(puzzled)

You could say that. He just kind

of popped up out of nowhere, more

or less.

JARED

Yeah, he does that to me too.

CLAYTON

When you gonna come over and rake

up all those leaves and fix up my

garage.

JARED

When you start paying me the big

bucks. (laughs)

ADAM

How long have you been neighbors?

JARED

It’s been, oh I don’t know…how

long has it been now.

CLAYTON

Just over 12 years, I suppose.

JARED

Yea that seems about right. 12 years

ago. I’m going to head back in and

start cleaning up.

(Jared goes back into the bar)

ADAM

(Looks at Clayton)

What did you mean earlier you are

almost at the end of your rope?

CLAYTON

Well kid, I look at it this way

I have done some pretty bad things

In my time and I guess I have to

Pay for it. I have Cancer and the

Doc gave me 3 months to live.

ADAM

I’m sorry man. When did you say

you assassinated the wrong guy?

CLAYTON

(puzzled)

Close to 20 years ago. Why?

ADAM

Have you ever talked to Jared about

his dad?

CLAYTON

Not directly. I talked to his mom

About it, but she said that Jared

was too young to remember. Some

kind of accident or something.

I’ve never gotten into conversation

with him about it. What are you

getting at?

ADAM

I think you may have found you’re

“lost child”.

CLAYTON

(uncomfortable laugh)

You’re joking. You’re not saying…

(pauses)

Oh, my God! That makes sense.

He’s the right age, looks just like

him. How could I have not seen it?

ADAM

I don’t know, but it might be time

to talk Jared, and talk to him about

it. It might not even be what

happened, but at least you tried.

I gotta go.

(Adam leaves)

CLAYTON

(Doesn’t move for a moment)

I can’t believe it. Hey, Jared!

(leave scene)

(FADE OUT)

Are you a Vikings Fan?

How do you if you’re a Minnesota Vikings fan? I’ve come up with a top 10 list of ways in my opinion to tell:

10. You know the entire purple line-up by heart, including coaching staff, cheer leading staff, office crew, owners, and scouts.

9. You have Zygi Wilf’s autograph.

8. You hate Brett Farve more than you’re ex-wife who took half of your stuff.

7. Purple isn’t gay.

6. You’re best friend is a packers fan.

5. You think it would be the greatest Superbowl in history if the Packers and Vikings faced off.

4. You cry after the Vikings lose, but still say that it’s a hopeful season.

3. Purple is still not gay.

2. You’ve never heard of Leif Erikson.

1. That damn Brett Farve!!!